There comes a point when watching the witless sequel, that nobody wanted, Ride Along 2, where, at about the hour mark, I was left to question..will I laugh ever? Thankfully, a sketch about midway through (one that involves Kevin Hart and an alligator) saves this movie from being a complete bomb, but, as far as sequels goes, this is as poorly scripted as it gets.

Tim Story once again stands behind the directing chair – bringing forth a sequel to the surprise box office hit (which for a little while held the MLK opening weekend record). ONLY this time instead of a muddy exposition, complete with a lengthy Ice Cube proverbed screaming intimidating monologue ..oh wait we still have that. Let me try again, ONLY this time we don’t have Kevin Hart rambling high pitched squeals that serve no purpose…oh wait we still have that too. SO if we have all the same ingredients that made the first Ride Along unbearable..why did we make a sequel and then not improve upon those mistakes? That, my readers, is wherein lies the question.

As I mentioned briefly, Ride Along 2 is tireless, if not, horrid excuse of a movie. It’s a film that serves very little (if any) purpose to its demographic. Honestly, it’s kind of villainous when you think about it, studio executives coaxing the public to sit down for another two hours of basically the same thing they saw two years ago. Then again, I suppose if you actually liked Ride Along, you probably already have your tickets pre-ordered and this review is not for you. If you are, however, on the fence (maybe you sort of-kind of liked Ride Along) – listen to the next few paragraphs wisely.

Cube and Hart return as the “brothers in law” James Payton and Ben Barber. The former is still a hotshot detective trying to zero in on another lead in a case, only to have the former bombard with his (predictable) shenanigans that cause a serious ruckes. This time instead of sticking around in Atlanta, the duo head to the sunny beaches of Miami to track down a drug lord who maybe supplying dealers in their hometown with expensive product. Of course, what was supposed to be two days turns into an all riot, as the gang struggles in a chess match with a seemingly arrogant wealthy businessman Antonio Pope (Benjamin Bratt) – that seems to have some tricks up his sleeve. They do catch a break with former hacker AJ (Ken Jeong) who could be the key to the entire operation. Oh, and they also need to do all this before Ben marries James sister in less than a week.

So there it is, more or less. You probably would care to know that Olivia Munn (a terrific actress from HBOs The Newsroom) is in the movie, but is reduced to typically cliche fodder. The sad part is..at least she tries. Hart & Cube (and pretty much everyone else) seemed to have phoned in their performances for a quick paycheck. I mean it’s nice that the entire crew did come back for a sequel (but honestly, was it one that we needed?) I think Kevin Hart is an extremely talented comedian (one of the best this generation has seen) it’s too bad that time after time I have to sit and watch as he stumbles from one terrible comedy to the next. I only hope that sooner or later he will get the movie he deserves of his caliber. As for Ride Along 2? there isn’t much more I can bring myself to say, I mean I guess the movie is ‘somewhat’ watchable because of Cube and Hart..but that can only go so far.

On a final note, to just kind of put it in perspective..there is a gag about 45 minutes into the film that has Jeong’s character telling Hart’s character to eat a pile of disgusting nachos from out of a public trashcan..the punchline being: Hart eats them. Could this perhaps be a metaphor for how terribly sloppy this feature films is? I think there is potential there for a great conversation, the most positive thing I can say about this dud. D-